We go through life creating numerous plans, and doing our best, to achieve them. But in the process, we have to toggle between the past and the future. This causes us to go back and forth continually. The moment, in which we are operating, is often ignored, and we lose what is most important – connecting with the people present, or seeing the situation from a higher vantage point. Without the awareness of what we are losing in the moment, we could lose a lot more. This is being in the moment.
Without awareness, we operate from our Reptilian Brain which only has 4 clear choices:
Or we operate from our emotional brain, which operates from FEELING. We need to get back to our best brain. The thinking brain. From this highest brain, we are able to see many more options. I believe, that the more options we have, the more power we wield.
Can we really create more options?
Yes! We can! How? By being aware of the moment. We are aware, we operate from our logical brain. This is where we can see better, and hear more clearly. We can then use our power to analyze the situation and see what is the best approach we should use to get the most of it.
Let me give you an example.
Let’s say you are a part of a group of like-minded people, and someone creates an issue within that group. What could you do …. to JUICE the Moment?
Lets look at 3 clear possibilities:
a) You could avoid the issue entirely, and be a fly on the wall, or a cat on the fence. This means you can avoid doing anything and hope the incident sorts itself out.
b) You can jump in and use your power of understanding and your power to influence, and you can suggest some way out of the issue that will cause the least collateral damage. This is the compromise formula, and it does work at most times.
c) You could decide to be the persons in the moment, and you could be neutral and fair, and you can offer your best suggestions, in the overall interest of the group. Most people do not realise that they are not in the group to be the peacemaker or the friend. When they are in a group, they should follow the ethos of the group. They should play the role of doing what is in the best interest of the organization or group. The long term interests of the group will be best served, when they do what is BEST for the group.
If we are citizens of India, we should look at situations, not from a partisan viewpoint, but from a viewpoint of what is best for the country. The group here is the biggest group that any of us will belong to. (Unless you take Chinese Citizenship. 🙂 We should also have the ability to stand up and share that viewpoint. In that moment, one of your friends or long term acquaintances may not like what you did, because it did not agree with their line of thinking.
But what is more important? Getting brownie points for yourself? Or helping the organization. If your decision could have long term implications for your your group, then you should do what is best for the org.
Sometimes its better to lose the small battles in order to WIN THE WAR. ~ Sun Tzu ~
So, by looking at the big picture, you not only build your own ability as a leader, but you help protect your organization. Juicing the moment is not about winning battles, but it is about doing your best to protect your image and your organization’s image. Doing anything else is playing at the wrong level.
In companies too, individuals lose a ton of credibility by playing to the present gallery. Look at it from a practical point of view. You are going to live for a long time more. Right? Are you not going to be a part of many other groups as you move ahead in life? Don’t you think any decision you take today, can affect your reputation tomorrow?
Remember Nothing lasts forever. Your friends or family may be on your side today, or they may be against you some other day. But if you look back and analyze… did you do what was best for your best self, or more so, what was best for the family? Did you do what was best for your avatar of tomorrow? Then you are credible and consistent… and you may have lost the battle. But what is most important.. is that you will WIN the WAR.
Are you playing the FINITE GAME…. or the INFINITE GAME?
Are you a FINITE LEADER… or an INFINITE LEADER?
It is easy to get drawn into the emotion of the moment, and you will have to face many such situations in life. You will face it in your spousal relationship. You will face it with colleagues or boss at the office. But in each and every relationship, if you can ask what is the best way for me to enjoy this moment? Your infinite mind should say… Don’t look for a win in the present moment. Squeeze what courage and honesty you have in you that will build your LONG TERM REPUTATION. Never settle for a present win at the cost of a long term loss. Better to lose the moment, so you can play from a better and a higher place tomorrow.
I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST!
Corporate Trainer, Leadership Coach and Motivational Speaker.